Adoption on screen: What cinema gets wrong (and why it matters)

Adoption has long served as a dramatic plot device in film. From fairytales to superhero blockbusters, adopted characters are often portrayed as lost, troubled, or even dangerous. While some films attempt to handle the complexity of adoption with care, many fall into lazy stereotypes or damaging narratives.

For adopted children and their families, these portrayals are more than just stories. They can shape how children understand their identity, how peers perceive adoption, and how society responds to adoptive families. When adoption is reduced to trauma, abandonment, or villainy, the impact can echo far beyond the screen.

In this blog, we explore how adoption is portrayed in popular films - from the negative tropes that persist in cinema to the rare but valuable stories that get it right. We look at specific examples, unpack why certain portrayals are problematic, and highlight movies that offer more thoughtful, inclusive perspectives. Most importantly, we share practical advice for adoptive parents navigating these moments with their children - so you can turn a potentially harmful narrative into an opportunity for connection, reflection, and reassurance.

This is not about banning films or overanalysing every storyline. It is about understanding the messages children receive and giving them the tools to interpret those messages with confidence and clarity. Because every child deserves to see themselves represented with care - and every family deserves stories that reflect the depth and dignity of their experiences.

When adoption becomes a problem on screen

Too often, adoption is portrayed as the root of a character’s emotional issues, identity confusion, or moral downfall. These narratives may be subtle or overt, but they share one thing in common: they suggest that being adopted is a problem to be solved, a flaw to be fixed, or a backstory to be overcome.

Adoption becomes shorthand for instability - an easy explanation for why a character might feel angry, isolated, or dangerous. Instead of exploring the complexity of adoption with care, films often use it as a convenient excuse for poor behaviour or dramatic conflict. The adopted child is framed as incomplete or inherently troubled. Their adoptive family is depicted as not quite “real.” Their birth family, if mentioned at all, is usually shrouded in mystery, trauma, or loss.

Even in animated films aimed at children, adoption is frequently used as a way to separate a character from a sense of belonging. Often, this storyline is never resolved with clarity or compassion. Instead, the message lingers: you are different, and different is difficult.

This repetition of negative or one-dimensional portrayals has an accumulative effect. For viewers with no lived experience of adoption, it reinforces outdated myths and assumptions. For adopted children, it quietly but powerfully undermines their sense of self-worth. It tells them their story is inherently dramatic, flawed, or fractured - something to be hidden or explained away.

What is often missing is the reality: that adoption is not a character flaw or a narrative shortcut. It is a lifelong experience, shaped by love, loss, identity, and growth, and like any family story, it deserves thoughtful, respectful representation.

Here are a few recurring examples:

1. Loki – Marvel Cinematic Universe

Loki’s character arc centres around betrayal, rage, and a desire for power, fuelled in part by discovering he was adopted by Odin after being taken from the Frost Giants. His adoption is treated as a secret shame, and when revealed, it becomes a reason for his identity crisis and villainous turn. The implication? That adoption creates resentment and alienation. It reinforces the idea that adopted children are ticking emotional time bombs, that discovering one’s origins can only lead to pain or rejection of one’s adoptive family.

2. Stuart Little

Even seemingly positive outcomes and depictions may be interlised differently for adoptees. Let's use Stuart Little as an example - In Stuart Little (1999), Stuart, a mouse, is adopted by the Little family and becomes part of their home. As he starts to bond with his new family, a pair of mice arrive claiming to be his birth parents. The Littles, though heartbroken, reluctantly allow Stuart to go with them. It is later revealed that these “birth parents” were imposters hired by the family cat to get rid of Stuart. The Littles immediately go looking for him and eventually rescue him, affirming their love and commitment. Despite the Littles’ later actions, the scene where they allow Stuart to leave with strangers, without fully investigating or resisting, could be deeply unsettling for young adoptees. It risks sending the message that adoptive families are conditional or that they can be reversed if someone from your past appears. For a child who already questions whether they truly belong, this storyline may quietly reinforce fears of being “sent back” or replaced.

3. Despicable Me

In Despicable Me, Gru adopts three orphaned girls, not out of a desire to parent, but as part of a calculated scheme to infiltrate his enemy’s fortress using the girls’ cookie-selling charm. At the start, the adoption is purely strategic. Gru is cold and dismissive, and the girls are unaware that they are pawns in his villainous plot. As the story unfolds, Gru gradually becomes emotionally attached to the girls, and by the end, he embraces his role as their loving father. Although Despicable Me ultimately shows a redemptive arc and a loving outcome, the underlying message is troubling. The initial portrayal frames adoption as a transaction, a tool for manipulation. The girls are not adopted because they are loved, but because they are useful. This sets up a dynamic where their value is tied to their ability to serve a purpose.

4. The Country Bears

In The Country Bears, a live-action Disney film about a young bear named Beary Barrington who is raised by a human family, there is a moment that is played for laughs, but lands poorly in the context of adoption. Beary, feeling out of place in his family of humans, discovers he is adopted. His human brother taunts him with an exaggerated, sarcastic statement: “You’re not my brother! You’re a BEAR! You’re adopted!” This is delivered as a punchline, complete with dramatic music and Beary’s hurt reaction. The scene treats adoption as the joke itself. The laugh comes not from clever writing but from the implication that being adopted, and biologically different, is bizarre and worthy of mockery. While it may go over some children’s heads, for others (particularly those with lived experience of adoption), it reinforces a cruel idea: you do not belong, and others can use that against you.

These examples, while varied in tone and genre, all share a common flaw: they reduce adoption to a source of conflict, humour, or narrative convenience. For children, especially those who are adopted, these portrayals can quietly shape their understanding of self-worth, permanence, and belonging. Whether the message is that love must be earned, families can be undone, or difference is something to mock, the result is the same: adoption is positioned as “other.” And when stories reinforce that idea again and again, it can become harder for children to see their family story reflected with dignity, depth, or care.

When cinema gets it (mostly) right

Thankfully, not every film falls into these traps. Some portrayals offer layered, empathetic, and uplifting depictions of adoption and family. These films often show adoption as part of a child's story, not the whole of it. They allow room for grief, love, and growth, all without reducing characters to tropes.

The Tigger Movie (2000)

Tigger, always the exuberant and bouncy member of the Hundred Acre Wood, begins to feel isolated because he believes he is the only one of his kind. Longing for connection, he sets out to find his biological family, only to discover that they may not exist. Eventually, he realises that the friends who care for him deeply, Pooh, Piglet, Eeyore, and others, are his real family. The film honours the natural curiosity and yearning some adopted children feel about their origins, without positioning it as disloyalty. Tigger is allowed to feel lonely and uncertain, but he is also shown that identity and family can be chosen and experienced, not just inherited. It offers a gentle message that belonging is not about sameness, but about connection.

Kung Fu Panda 2

Po learns that he was adopted after surviving an attack that wiped out his birth family. The discovery throws him into emotional turmoil, and he begins to question who he really is. But rather than rejecting his adoptive father, Mr. Ping, or seeing his past as shameful, Po eventually integrates his history into his present. He honours his birth family’s memory while continuing to deepen his bond with Mr. Ping. This film is a rare example where adoption is not framed as a betrayal or loss of identity. Po is allowed to grieve and seek answers, but his existing family is never invalidated. The film acknowledges that adopted children often live between two stories, and shows that they do not have to choose one over the other. Both can belong.

Lilo & Stitch

After the tragic loss of their parents, Lilo is raised by her older sister, Nani, in a precarious family situation threatened by social services. When Stitch, a chaotic alien fugitive, enters their lives, he becomes both a source of disruption and an unexpected catalyst for healing. Over time, they create a family that defies convention but is held together by fierce loyalty and love. The film shows that family can emerge from crisis, be unorthodox, and still be real. It does not sugar-coat loss or paint love as easy, but it does affirm that relationships forged through effort and care are just as legitimate as those based on biology. “Ohana means family” becomes more than a quote, it becomes a framework for inclusion, repair, and belonging.

Paddington

Paddington arrives in London after losing his uncle in a natural disaster. He is taken in by the Brown family, who are unsure at first, but grow to love and protect him as one of their own. The film follows Paddington’s integration into this new life while he navigates being different, misunderstood, and underestimated. While not explicitly about adoption, Paddington’s journey captures many emotional truths of it, displacement, the need for welcome, and the experience of navigating a world that sees you as “other.” The Brown family’s shift from cautious guardians to devoted parents speaks to how care and consistency build trust. Paddington is never asked to change who he is to be loved.

These films may not be perfect, but they offer something vital: representations of adoption and non-traditional families that are layered, compassionate, and affirming. They move beyond the tired tropes of abandonment or villainy and instead explore belonging, identity, and love with nuance. For adopted children, these stories can offer a mirror, one that reflects the possibility of being fully accepted, fully loved, and fully themselves. And for parents, they provide a starting point for meaningful conversations about what family really means. In a media landscape where adoption is too often misunderstood, these films show us what it looks like when it is honoured with care.

What parents can do when the portrayal falls short

You cannot control what every film says about adoption, but you can shape how your child makes sense of it. When a negative portrayal crops up, it is not always a disaster. It can be a door.

Here’s how to walk through it:

1. Watch with your child

If you know a film features adoption themes, watch it together. Be present to notice how your child reacts. You might catch a flicker of discomfort, or curiosity, that leads to a conversation.

2. Name the stereotype

Gently point out what felt unfair or untrue. For example: “It seemed like they gave Stuart away really easily. That is not how adoption works in real life. What did you think about that?” Naming the problem gives children permission to question it.

3. Talk after, not just during

The most meaningful discussions often happen later. During a walk. While doing the dishes. Let your child know they can revisit scenes that made them feel weird or sad, even days after watching.

4. Offer other narratives

Balance the books by showing them films where adoption is treated with compassion. Share real-life stories of adoptees, families, and advocates who reflect the diversity and strength of the adoption community.

5. Let them lead the tone

Some children are deeply affected by negative depictions. Others might shrug them off. Follow your child’s lead. If they seem upset, validate it. If they seem fine, do not push, but keep the door open.

6. Share your values

Explain how your family understands adoption. Talk about how people sometimes misunderstand things they have not experienced. Remind your child that they are deeply loved, not despite being adopted, but as part of their story.

Final thoughts

Screenwriters have long leaned on familiar clichés, adopted villains, orphaned misfits, and heroes defined by a missing past. These tropes may serve a story, but they often do so at the expense of real children and families. Adoption is not a twist or a backstory to be overcome. It is a lived experience, shaped by identity, loss, love, and belonging, and it deserves to be portrayed with the depth and dignity it holds in real life.

As adoptive families, adoptees, and allies, we have the power to shift the narrative. Not just by challenging what is harmful, but by celebrating what is true. By sharing richer, more honest stories, on screen and off, we create a world where adoption is not something to be mocked, misunderstood, or feared, but recognised as one of many ways families are made.

Because every child deserves more than a stereotype. They deserve to be seen, heard, and celebrated, as the main character in their own story.

Speak soon,

The Walk Together Team